little exciting things...

Yipeeeeeee ..... done with my Msc. school project, whaaaat that was a tough task and I now regard those who write research projects with renewed respect especially my big brother who was awarded a PHD in Economics this year. I defended the project a few days ago and most exciting was when one of the panelists said that I have very good writing skills (project writing)...he had a small 'but' somewhere... I didn't hear it!!!

My teen cousins called me early yesterday morning to inform me that they had performed decently in school last term...awesssooomeee...one of them is about to break a record we set together, I'm going to be broke soon if they keep performing so well! proud mother hen.

The landlady called me a few days ago to thank me for always paying my rent in good time...unheard of!!!

My aunty is graduating tomorrow (undergraduate), she has survived being in school with much younger classmates who are her children's age and some younger. So proud of her for doing it despite, and boy she has an outstanding GPA!

Finally got a car....have to let my brother have it first though and then we start looking for another that suits me soon after he sells the one he currently has.

I haven't started the bookshop...I don't have a good explanation/excuse... not sure I want it so much now...If not it, I have something at the back of my mind, will not talk about it, pretty embarrassing to talk and no action..

Palmhouse Foundation mentoring session was awesome this term, I go there to work, to organise and coordinate the tasks and I end up learning so much from these sessions. This time my pal whom I dragged there once came on his own accord and brought a friend too... nicely infectious!

I am about to complete the Msc, I give lots of credit to peer pressure for this far we have come. I had awesome classmates whom we've pushed each other all through, I actually enjoyed learning it despite the high pressure to complete it in 1 year rather than the standard 2 years.

Its the really little things that get me really excited!

promoting a reading culture

Still turning around the idea of a bookshop in my mind, its not going away, its sounding exciting day by day. One of the things I have thought of that I would love to do for my community/ society is to promote a reading culture.

Location - My mama has a small kiosk, next to it is a vacant room which leaks so no one wants it but I want it now. I'll have it fixed to a decent state in the next couple of weeks.

Margins - The population lies somewhere between lower lower class and lower middle class, its is not high end therefore low margins expected and have to be creative to move volumes.

Inventory - I visited a large book retail and wholesaler in the city and they have a couple of requirements I have to provide before they can sell to me on wholesale (business registration etc) will request my brother to assist here.

Crazy - Was once asked at a meeting to share a dream, a lofty dream - my dream was to own a whole street in the city, the large book retail and wholesale shop I visited is located on 'this street' and there are several publishing houses next to it, its official, am keeping that dream!

Environment - There are many nursery and primary schools in the area so there's a basic level of education, many households, a few slums, 2 small dispensaries, churches, one factory. I think this society could find great use for books and the education could improve our society significantly.

The journey of a 1000miles has already started in my mind...

The Ultimate Gift

Yesterday I re-watched (the hundredth time) the movie The Ultimate Gifts the 12 gifts Red Stevens gave Jason were:

• The Gift of Work
• The Gift of Friends
• The Gift of Money
• The Gift of Family
• The Gift of Learning
• The Gift of Problems
• The Gift of Laughter
• The Gift of Giving
• The Gift of Gratitude
• The Gift of a Day
• The Gift of Dreams
• The Gift of Love

The kind of gifts easy to overlook...but are gifts anyway, great gifts!

Borrowed from Robin Sharma's blog

Robin Sharma recently posted on his blog 10 quotes changed his life, 62 tips to get unstuck in 2013 and 50 business + life lessons that 2012 taught him ... I borrowed the few below from his blogs.

“To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one’s self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived—this is to have succeeded.”
—Bessie Anderson Stanley

  

Start your day with 20 minutes of exercise. Exercising for 20 minutes first thing in the morning is a game-changer.

Be on time (bonus points: be early). Don’t be on time–Be early.

Do a collage filled with images of your ideal life. Look at it once a day for focus and inspiration.

Take on projects no one else will take on. Set goals no one else will do.

Spend more time in art galleries. Art inspires, stimulates creativity and pushes boundaries.

World-class begins when you think you’ve done a great job but know you can do a better job.

 

I have a lot of work cut out for me, but I'll show up and deliver!

Book Affair

I poke holes in arguments/theories, I want to touch or feel things, I question and analyse alot, I defy trends, I say alot of bu...tttss; until I understand. It is not a very good thing, sounds like approaching everything from a doubt angle but not really, it is seeking to understand. After it makes sense to me, I can be confident in sharing my opinion about it. Consolation, Bereans in the Bible were considered of noble character as after they were taught by the apostles, they went home and examined the scripture to confirm what they were taught was true.

I have enjoyed reading Linchpin by Seth Godin, he has aroused the question of the difference between Art and Craft. In primary school/elementary school we studied a subject art and craft where we learnt mosaic and collage, wood work where we would learn carpentry joints etc.
He says that our work is our Art. He also says that Art is not it until the receiver appreciates it and admires it, therefore It has to be realy outstanding. The people who create Art enjoy it, they would still do it even if no one noticed but once it is recognised they make history. Picasso, Van Gogh, Stephen Covey etc.

I have also enjoyed reading Dead Aid: Why Aid is not Working and How There is a Better Way for Africa by Dr. Dambisa Moyo. It was interesting to discover Switzerland is a landlocked country - some of the poor performing countries in Africa are landlocked and it sure looks like that is the reason why it is hard to excel but nope... Something else that comes across from the book is when you receive free things, there's higher chance of waste and not using it for appointed projects. China's role in Africa is more of business. They offer a service which requires payment over time. Their finances are definitely used for the appointed projects.

The other books am reading are my school books....whaaat....things are thick but I shall excel.

I am learning and appreciating new things. I am looking forward to start the project, I hope I shall end up with an enjoyable topic which I can deliver well on.

I think I should start a bookshop...



Anxiety-Optimistic



Nervousness-Pessimistic

I am anxious about something... not sure what...

too blessed.....

I think I figured out why I do not have a checklist.

 

 

I have been peering at some of my friends checklists and things they contain would not appear on my list if I had one as they are basic human qualities as I have been brought up to know.

They are items that I pray my children would learn and exercise too . I have been blessed to have those qualities around me since I was a child and they are not things I would put on a list to tick against.

 

 

Many books and what we have learnt over time says the role of the man in a family is to be a protector, provider, vision carrier, friend to the woman and children. I have been so blessed that I have grown up surrounded by all those from the men in my life.

 

 

My father is a super strict man, when we were kids, he would drive in and all of us, even our neighbours children would take off to their houses for we would be definitely be beaten for all the wrong things we had done but we did not fear him. My friends say their father would walk in and they would all leave the family room and go to the bedrooms but for us we only left when a visitor came in and we needed to give them space , the rest of the time we all sat there, my sister or I would cook dinner,  mom would serve it and we’d all sit and eat, watch news, make idle chat until bed time. We also used to fight alot; someone wasn’t performing too well in school, my brother had probably gotten into a fight earlier in the day with other boys, complaints of being sent to fetch this and that too much, someone moved another person’s item inconveniencing them..bla bla.  Funny, when a guest came in, he would find us talking loudly, everyone wanted their point to be heard, and my father would make an excuse saying we were just a noisy bunch. We have had a friendly set up to this day, when we all end up at home, we make all the noise in the world. Now I go home and sit and chat for long with my dad about lots of stuff, fuss all over him when he’s not being healthy and I really admire and respect him a lot .

My brothers have fought other people to protect us. When we were kids, small boys wouldn’t beat me up because my brother had taken it up as his role, he would beat me up, I would tell on him, he would be beaten up again and would threaten me, I would tell on him, he would ask me to do something, I would refuse and he would beat me up and it was a cycle. I grew even more stubborn and defiant and he beat me up even more but no one external of nuclear family would beat me up at all, he would fight and beat up them up for me...ridiculous!

One day I got into a matatu, we had fought before we left the house and we all went separate ways but ended up in the same public vehicle somehow. Where I was seated, a drunk young man started talking to me and he was quit irritating and I shrugged him off. I hadn’t seen my brother and he hadn’t seen me either. It happened that he was sitting next to some boys who I were in my class and they were talking about that girl who was in their class who had just gotten into the matatu and he looked up and saw it was me. Back to my seat mate, he continued talking to me and me ignoring him, this went on for a while. At some point someone from behind asked the driver to stop the matatu, it was past a stage so the driver pulled up fast thinking someone had missed their stop. My brother got off the matatu, took a hold of my seatmate and beat him up thoroughly. All this time, I hadn’t seen my brother so was shocked to see him and relieved at the same time. No one in the matatu could understand what was going on. The driver came to stop the fight and find out what could have been going on. My brothers jacket fell off, he picked it, shrugged off the dust once and gave it to me..that’s when the passenger realised there was a connection between me and him. The conductor who had been there all along realised what had been going on and told the story. All the passengers applauded my brother and we continued with the journey.

I hang out with my older brother a lot with his friends till late into the night but he would ensure that he took me home. When he couldn’t, he found someone who would take me to the doorstep and wait until my parents let me in. He would ensure I was fed, probably over fed before he was ok I was fine. If I looked cold, he gave me his jacket to wear and keep warm (he still does that to date). If I looked uncomfortable, he would find an excuse to make us leave the place. My other brother also drops me at my door step and drives off when he’s sure am safe. My brothers pay my entertainment bills all the time and when broke will take a loan from me to pay for the bills and promise to pay back later...can’t remember if the pay back or not J

In turn, I think my brother has ‘2’ wives...me being the ‘second’, when his wife is away, I have to entertain his guests, will probably go with him to a lot of  things, I have been to his in-laws house more than anyone else in my family. When he is away, I manage his accounts, anyone who needs something from him will more often than not ask me to ask him (even my parents). I have had to pack his bags when he’s travelling and I do grumble a lot when doing these things, but I really do not have much of a choice. I am glad he is married!  My other brother will make me accompany him to events, make me go visiting with him, drag me around as much as he can. He got admitted once in hospital and I had to sit in that hospital for long, chatting, getting worried and taking care of him as much as I could. I had to sleep at my friend’s house who lived near the hospital and I had a job interview the following day so had to borrow a whole outfit, I got the job J, I can’t wait for him to get married!

I’ve run out of stories about these amazing guys in my life. I am blessed!

Now I do not have a list because I have already experienced lots of those things I would want on my list. I am ‘complete’ so to speak.  I do hope to meet a ‘complete’ guy too, who’s not expecting me to fill a void, or be something he has always hoped for.  I hope it will be a great companionship with synergy and not filled with unmet expectations. I do hope I can have the wonderful qualities in my family and his family  carried forward to our children and children’s children.

Give too much/too little credit...

Do you give too much credit to yourself and to others or too little...

We were always taught to be humble so it sort of became a lifestyle, I do not think thats how it was intended to work anyway. Rarely will I pat myself on the back. I recently read What Got You Here Won't Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith a story of a ridiculous girl ...in a pretty blue dress and when complimented gets nervous, says she just picked it random, its not even pressed...and so on...and guy rolls his eyes and wonders just say thank you! and I laughed at myself. On the other hand I compliment others accordingly, when they are impressive I am adequately impressed.

Now I have met a few different people who are unafraid to compliment themselves and if you disagree some won't care much (they already think they are impressive) some will be offended (how could you!)
This is the lot that worries me a little because when you give me a great impression I hold it and the day you don't live to the expectation I end up disappointed. Again they say you should't meet your heroes.

Everyone talked about a certain club, it was a huge excitement how great it looked and so much fun that comes with it. I delayed going to see it but when I finally did, it was a major disappointment. It had wooden tables, awkward drunk people and all..harsh judgement....but only beacuse it din't live up to my expectation.I do not like to be shortchanged. Had I not received the report, I could have considered it an alright place.

Same goes with people, I think it is good to be moderate with giving credit to yourself because when you do not live up to the expectations...its not pretty. If you set high expectations on me as well I get the impression that you also would meet my highest expectations and it is odd when you do not live up.

I think too much or too little isn't good make it as real as possible....a lesson I need to learn as well.

another random...

Random 1: I have a number of young friends and cousins both boys and girls, I call them my under-18s though they are past 18years. One of them is an engineer, another a student of economics, another entrepreneur who has gone off my radar, another dropped out of school, another a student architect. What they have in common is, they are 'crazy', they do daring things, speak their minds, they are searching for relevance and meaning of life and are fun to hang out with.
Now the engineer works as a managemnet trainee in a telecom company and he just attended a training on leadership for a week this past week. He's highly opinionated and critical so when he says he enjoyed it, thought the facilitators were impressive and such, you have to believe him. They were asked to assess their leadership characteristics and improve, change or stop what they do right or what they do wrong accordingly. They need to appoint an accountability partner whom they could share their SWOT and actions with during this period...and you guess correctly who he picked :)

Random 2: I am currently sitting end of semester 1 exams, they are challenging but I had better perform and excellently at that. Before I hand in my paper I usually mark my own exam...try to count what my score might come to, am not usually accurate but close by apart from one ACCA paper which I have never understood what the examiner needed to this day. When I sat for my final high school exams, what I scored was very close to what I expected (but I had really wanted to join a public university and had missed it by a point) and could even tell my worst performed subject. My brother decided to call my school and ask for a breakdown of scores per subject and alas, my best paper was my worst paper way off from my expectations and the one I expected a dismal performance had performed averagely. I asked the National Examination Council to re-mark that paper...long process but in the end that earned me an extra 5 points and could join the university easily. I still mark my exams and life too...if there's a probability of a certain outcome, I dont expect it to be too different from the actual.

Random 3: Office reshuffled yesterday, I now report to a certain lady who pays alot of attention to what I don't and which sometimes am disinterested in as she is HR oriented. Very few people can stand her and I suspect I was just a pawn. It will be interesting working with her, I will emerge refined or as a friend says, maybe she shall change. Recently she placed an order for smaller capacity flash disks as the ones staff currently have are too large...???? but I will do my best :).

Random 4: I think one my best past times is making noise, chatting alot...with intersting company. My brother was around for 10 days and for several of those days we have stayed up late chatting with our friends. Yesterday his flight was pushed back by 2 hours and we sat with him at the airport until his check-in time just chatting...got home late and I had to be in the office today.

Random 5: I had wanted to go to a tree planting excercise today morning but had to work, so much backlog due to being away from office for exams. Could have hosted a friend but we sort of did not make a commitment for that and sounds a little odd to bring it up so later today I'll excite myself to attend an opera...so curious to find out how it will be.

random...

Random 1: Touch is absolutely important and yet so disturbing when done by wrong person or right person at the wrong time. It means alot and sometimes it will mean nothing or simply am comfortable with you.
So now when a tout/ conductor insists on holding my hand when trying to get into a matatu/ bus is annoying... thats my personal space, get out of it, I dont know you, I can find my way into the bus...etc is what goes through my mind and have fought quite a few for that. I dont know how to classify these other group well but I have a lovely young friend, but he is tooo touchy, wants to hold my hand when talking to me, hold me, hug me all the time..it feels so inappropriate.
It is quite interesting as other people will do it and am comfortable with it but others I just want to run.

Random 2: I used to work with this person very admirable, he has good work ethic, purposeful life, family man, leader in society, role model to many. I consider him my mentor and he is a hero, I have been his apprentice for a long time and I respect him alot. I decided some day that I had learnt quite a bit under his wing and left but we still get to do many other things together. One difference between us is he attaches value to money alot and I probably dont value it as much, for me it is a by product not the main product. Recently we worked on something and he decided he would pay me for it from his own pocket and he insisted. Now the work delayed quite a bit due to 3rd parties involvement and when I tried it hurry it up, he decided to give the people a little more time to complete it. This resulted on a fine and he said I would have to pay for it, that just meant he wouldn't pay what he had promised as I was responsible. I do not have a problem with that at all, he let me off easy as I was more disappointed that we did not have the work ready in good time. We still got more work to do but I hope he wont offer me any money, money can be a little insultive, am much happier when we get the desired results.

totally random... :)

wierd...maybe/maybe not.

Someday...cant wait..I will have a pond and on or around it have ducks, swans, cranes, geese, guinea fowls and maybe a peacock around them and short pretty trees. Not too many, just a few.

I got my chicken house finally! I havent gone home to pick the two chicken yet..will do so after exams. I also decided to keep a guinea fowl too. I'll keep them for fun, fun to know I own them.

I am a wierd/odd girl compared to others... have always liked cats and kittens they are calm, I can stand dogs but I find them needy and too affectionate while the cat will just glance when you walk in and mind their business, they only bother you if hungry or sit on/next to you and lick themselves.

I dont like to keep many animals of a kind, a cat with its kittens are pretty but as soon as they grow bigger, they become too much. I dont like animals kept ideally for production like cows and pigs, they are so big and not fun and require so much attention. I would like keep a horse, sheep and goats wandering around maybe 2 of each kind and sell off extras.

I like agriculture for its natural look but not keen to be a farmer. I like trees a few not too many either so will plant some tall ones (maybe jacaranda trees) and some short ones. I will plant grass that I can roll on. I like the easy environment and hope to have it some day.

Checklist...

In December two of my friends had a wedding, my role was kym-kazi ya mkono (Swahili) directly translated hand work -like a handy man- means running around to ensure everything is working well and all corners are covered. At one of the weddings I was given a pair of sun glasses to hold for the bride as she would need them during the ceremony alongside other items, a camera etc. Since my role was running around, I placed the sunglasses on a chair where the sister of the bride picked them and sat on the chair, she also got up at some point.....in the evening, the sun glasses got misplaced. We couldn't tell who had them last and this got the bride very upset.
The bride posted an update on social media that she thought she knew who her friends were but evidently she did not because she lost something of great sentimental value with them around...that sucked as I had the responsibility to take care of them.
She kept checking whether we had found them and eventually we resigned to the fact they were lost, but she did not forget :). So many days after the wedding she asked if we had ever found them I said not and she was really sad so I decided to take responsibility and pay for them. She was very excited at the thought and we even worked out a repayment plan, they were quite out of my league :). I fully repaid for them in a couple of months... but I wasn't too happy that she accepted the repayment...why, you would ask, yet I volunteered to do it anyway... can't explain why clearly...but our friendship's now a marshmallow.

I have been chatting up with a nice guy whom I met at one of my friends wedding, we are all at the marrying age so talks on what kind of partners we would like, come up. After many chats I narrowed down what I thought was his kind of girl, I wasn't it :) but I happened to know a girl who matched up to his description though she was seriously dating someone else.. bottomline, I could tell his kind. So he decided he would try find me a hook up and I asked him if he could describe my kind but he said I was dicreet so he couln't tell. It wasn't that really, he couldn't tell my kind because I didnt have a checklist. On the other hand he has a checklist which he refers to sometimes and that's how I could tell his kind/type.

It could be good to have a checklist but for me I only have a general idea of what I like and it sort of happens naturally and thus not need to ask... are you intelligent? are you hardworking? I find out as we get along and have realised some of the things I would want on my checklist (if I had one) are not as important as others I find in the person and others very impotant.
I think I should come up with a checklist but it would have minimum acceptable percentages..who even does that?! ...for instance he could be 90% intelligent but only 40% hardworking so nooowww...
Many times I have suffered buyers remorse, in boarding school I always looked forward to holidays and when they came I missed hanging out with my school friends and shortly I was looking forward to be back in school. What if somethings on my checklist dont turn to be as cool as I had hoped?


Marshmallows are cute and pretty and look tasty...but I think they taste flat and bland and the spongy feel isn't cool.
On the other hand cheese doesnt taste so good first time you have it, but you acquire the taste as you move along and you cant help but have a cheese burger, pizza , cheese potatoes etc

To have a checklist or not...hmmmm

upset...

Woke up today to news that one of our cabinet ministers, Minister for Environment & Mining Hon. John Michuki has passed on. He was one of the effective leaders we have known as a country especially in his previous docket as Minister for Tranport & Communication. Rest in Peace.
I sure hope he mentored many directly and transferred the good leadership qualities and lessons he had acquired.

Yesterday, a good galfriend was so upset with us (some other galfriends and I) because on Sunday we ended up having a picnic without her. She felt that we did not make any effort to contact her to join us. It happened by chance, we drove from church together (she attends a different service from us) and we got to a fast food restaurant but we decided to take the food away rather than sit. We found a nice picnic spot and had so much fun catching up.
Had better plan for a decent picnic soon for all of us.

Launching the #BEAGENDA2013 today for Palmhouse Foundation...that had better not be upsetting!

my 2 cents worth

Today am not feeling brilliant...my 2 cents worth is really not worth much but for what its worth, here's a little of what I'v been going through in no particular sequence.

I worked on a document earlier this week and submitted it as done, unfortunately I did not save the updated changes. My boss did not open it and forwaded as it was. The recepient had quite a bit of questions and that was not impressive of me.

I have been going to class for over a month now, starting to get the hang of things and learning lots of new things. I thought I knew what Finance was all about until I came across the content am reading now and it is so interesting unlike what I thought.

I decided to run a campaign in support of the Palmhouse Foundation endowment fund, I have worked partialy at it and forwarded to someone who could help with refining it, he's taken so long and am afraid I have created a curiosity in my audience (been talking a little about it) and haven't delivered it yet.
Late last year, I had another idea in its support too, its such a big magazine idea (in my humble view) and will take time developing it little by little.

We have someone in the company who came in recently to handle data analysis, but her expertise is in commercial development so does not have the skills to play around with the data to generate meaningful information. She ran it by me and asked me if I could assist, am not too good at it but I have a few ideas but not refined yet. I have worked a little on it and presented it and she did not look impressed though she liked a few variables...thats did not satisfy me so am currently (ok, on a different window) staring at it and hope it could convert itself to something brilliant*sigh

I have tonnes of assignments I need to do and I still havent bought my chicken house.

I think am developing the desire to own a car, fought to get into a public bus today to get to work on time and left a bad taste in my mouth. If I had one, I'd have picked the chicken house already and carried home a reading chair. Our roads are much better than they were a year ago so the wear and tear on the car would not be as significant. Our fares have gone up so high and almost equivalent to fueling a car. My new busy life has attracted the need for one.

I still want to own a house soon.

I had better start working and reading harder and being smarter. I need more than 2 cents worth!!!

Busy...the good type

I go to work Monday To Friday, I go to school Monday to Saturday, I volunteer in some organisations in between, I go to church on Sunday, I go home every once in a while, I meet up with friends once in a while, I clean up my house once in a while, I cook once in a while and am yet to find time to collect my chicken house.

Interestingly enough, am enjoying all these action.

I had been at a comfort zone for quite a while and did not like it at the end, so here I am taking as much as I can but maintaining a balance.

Maybe I shd think of dating too... hope to find 'chemical x'...ooh boy :)

An in between found sometime to post on the lazy blog.

I need to write down a plan...I have it in my mind but as I get busy, I'm not paying attention to it. Sad could it be if I ended up achieving nothing on my plan. I will review it every week..maybe on Saturday /Sunday... I'll plan that too :)

Its a New Year!

Happy New Year!

I enjoy reading what I have posted in the past, its quite interesting how my mind (anymind) works and how it changes.

I'm in a new job as an accountant, came across it quite interestingly..a story for another day. Its challenging, the environment is so different from what I have ever been exposed to, its very forward looking. I hope to deliver excellently.

I'm a new student, studying an msc in financial economics, havent started classes yet but I will work hard to perform excellently as I do not like my undergraduate grades one bit apart from one unit from very many.

Not so new, almost becoming irritating...I need to complete some 2 accounting professional papers I started a while back, hope to complete them in June this year.

I have been thinking through the definition of an asset, I am able to recognize huge, big assets that I do not have and intangible assets that I have.
Currently I am looking for small assets that I can consider as assets. A small piece of land is a true asset but when am not using it I do not consider it as one.
Cash in the bank is more of a liability than asset to me especially when I havent budgeted for it.
My mind is working hard to get a decent, interesting and challenging form of investment...maybe start on building a house..

I am looking to keep 3 chicken outside my house... sounds ridiculously fun.

I have volunteered to help a certain lady who runs a foundation to keep her accounts and I am still a trustee of Palmhouse Foundation.

I have quite a bit on schedule, I hope to be excellent at the things I do.

whoever did these...

I think they are creative!

my friend map from facebook

 I know 97% of my facebook friends and have met them in person....oops the map's dull!

a house...

Yesterday I called the landlady and asked if she has ever thought of selling the flat/apartment I currently rent. It is a small house with decent finishing that I really like, it is one of 13 apartments in the building. I have lived in several other houses but this is the only one the thought of buying has crossed my mind.

I have wanted to construct a small house for the longest time ever. I have never liked paying rent.
I googled a small house plan and still thinking about it though could modify it as we move along. I would not want to construct a dream house yet, my thoughts and dreams are fashioning out currently (I did not grow up with a definite dream, in kindergarten/nursery I wouldn't say what I wished to be when I grew up as other children did)

I would wish to own several apartments and a vacation home and a dream home some day. 

The land lady had thought of selling the units but is not sure how to go about it. She asked me to research about it and get back to her. I currently do not have the money to buy the house but I don't mind following up on a mini dream... who knows I could land a couple of millions sometime and I wont have to sit and think hard of what to do with it!

Smiling as I write this at how ridiculous it sounds at my current state, I cant wait for things to start looking up!

Things have been on a roller coaster!

I am a bit frazzled but very hopeful of a positive income and outcome.

I have become more aware of myself, I can almost explain what my dreams are and not think 'I am just saying for saying'.

I asked a friend why we bother go to work, to keep busy and to get ahead of our peers she answered, really, seriously, surely? I had better come up with a better explanation soon...but it has something to do with making a difference to my community,society and world at large.

I think I know why I like Mr.Donald Trump, he is powerful that is one of my attraction criteria and especially because it is not a position power its more of 'The Leader Who had no Title' by Robin Sharma Kind.
He hasn't been asked by anyone to deliver on certain parameters, he just delivers. If it was for his children, he would have stopped a while back when he made enough to support them. If it is greed, he wouldn't be working as hard, he would have found ways to cut corners and make easy quick money. He has a drive one not too many have.

I am out of a job as of the end of this month, reasons are related to above write up. I need to figure where I am going, to do what and start moving in that direction.

I need to do a lot of practice on the things I enjoy doing, It is said to become an expert at something I need to invest 10,000 hours at it.

I have been accessing a lot of random information from books, reality shows, practical experience and they are forming a critical path, I should be very scared now that am out of a job but I am not sure I am, I am looking for the best route to get me to where I intend to go.