Give too much/too little credit...

Do you give too much credit to yourself and to others or too little...

We were always taught to be humble so it sort of became a lifestyle, I do not think thats how it was intended to work anyway. Rarely will I pat myself on the back. I recently read What Got You Here Won't Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith a story of a ridiculous girl ...in a pretty blue dress and when complimented gets nervous, says she just picked it random, its not even pressed...and so on...and guy rolls his eyes and wonders just say thank you! and I laughed at myself. On the other hand I compliment others accordingly, when they are impressive I am adequately impressed.

Now I have met a few different people who are unafraid to compliment themselves and if you disagree some won't care much (they already think they are impressive) some will be offended (how could you!)
This is the lot that worries me a little because when you give me a great impression I hold it and the day you don't live to the expectation I end up disappointed. Again they say you should't meet your heroes.

Everyone talked about a certain club, it was a huge excitement how great it looked and so much fun that comes with it. I delayed going to see it but when I finally did, it was a major disappointment. It had wooden tables, awkward drunk people and all..harsh judgement....but only beacuse it din't live up to my expectation.I do not like to be shortchanged. Had I not received the report, I could have considered it an alright place.

Same goes with people, I think it is good to be moderate with giving credit to yourself because when you do not live up to the expectations...its not pretty. If you set high expectations on me as well I get the impression that you also would meet my highest expectations and it is odd when you do not live up.

I think too much or too little isn't good make it as real as possible....a lesson I need to learn as well.

another random...

Random 1: I have a number of young friends and cousins both boys and girls, I call them my under-18s though they are past 18years. One of them is an engineer, another a student of economics, another entrepreneur who has gone off my radar, another dropped out of school, another a student architect. What they have in common is, they are 'crazy', they do daring things, speak their minds, they are searching for relevance and meaning of life and are fun to hang out with.
Now the engineer works as a managemnet trainee in a telecom company and he just attended a training on leadership for a week this past week. He's highly opinionated and critical so when he says he enjoyed it, thought the facilitators were impressive and such, you have to believe him. They were asked to assess their leadership characteristics and improve, change or stop what they do right or what they do wrong accordingly. They need to appoint an accountability partner whom they could share their SWOT and actions with during this period...and you guess correctly who he picked :)

Random 2: I am currently sitting end of semester 1 exams, they are challenging but I had better perform and excellently at that. Before I hand in my paper I usually mark my own exam...try to count what my score might come to, am not usually accurate but close by apart from one ACCA paper which I have never understood what the examiner needed to this day. When I sat for my final high school exams, what I scored was very close to what I expected (but I had really wanted to join a public university and had missed it by a point) and could even tell my worst performed subject. My brother decided to call my school and ask for a breakdown of scores per subject and alas, my best paper was my worst paper way off from my expectations and the one I expected a dismal performance had performed averagely. I asked the National Examination Council to re-mark that paper...long process but in the end that earned me an extra 5 points and could join the university easily. I still mark my exams and life too...if there's a probability of a certain outcome, I dont expect it to be too different from the actual.

Random 3: Office reshuffled yesterday, I now report to a certain lady who pays alot of attention to what I don't and which sometimes am disinterested in as she is HR oriented. Very few people can stand her and I suspect I was just a pawn. It will be interesting working with her, I will emerge refined or as a friend says, maybe she shall change. Recently she placed an order for smaller capacity flash disks as the ones staff currently have are too large...???? but I will do my best :).

Random 4: I think one my best past times is making noise, chatting alot...with intersting company. My brother was around for 10 days and for several of those days we have stayed up late chatting with our friends. Yesterday his flight was pushed back by 2 hours and we sat with him at the airport until his check-in time just chatting...got home late and I had to be in the office today.

Random 5: I had wanted to go to a tree planting excercise today morning but had to work, so much backlog due to being away from office for exams. Could have hosted a friend but we sort of did not make a commitment for that and sounds a little odd to bring it up so later today I'll excite myself to attend an opera...so curious to find out how it will be.

random...

Random 1: Touch is absolutely important and yet so disturbing when done by wrong person or right person at the wrong time. It means alot and sometimes it will mean nothing or simply am comfortable with you.
So now when a tout/ conductor insists on holding my hand when trying to get into a matatu/ bus is annoying... thats my personal space, get out of it, I dont know you, I can find my way into the bus...etc is what goes through my mind and have fought quite a few for that. I dont know how to classify these other group well but I have a lovely young friend, but he is tooo touchy, wants to hold my hand when talking to me, hold me, hug me all the time..it feels so inappropriate.
It is quite interesting as other people will do it and am comfortable with it but others I just want to run.

Random 2: I used to work with this person very admirable, he has good work ethic, purposeful life, family man, leader in society, role model to many. I consider him my mentor and he is a hero, I have been his apprentice for a long time and I respect him alot. I decided some day that I had learnt quite a bit under his wing and left but we still get to do many other things together. One difference between us is he attaches value to money alot and I probably dont value it as much, for me it is a by product not the main product. Recently we worked on something and he decided he would pay me for it from his own pocket and he insisted. Now the work delayed quite a bit due to 3rd parties involvement and when I tried it hurry it up, he decided to give the people a little more time to complete it. This resulted on a fine and he said I would have to pay for it, that just meant he wouldn't pay what he had promised as I was responsible. I do not have a problem with that at all, he let me off easy as I was more disappointed that we did not have the work ready in good time. We still got more work to do but I hope he wont offer me any money, money can be a little insultive, am much happier when we get the desired results.

totally random... :)

wierd...maybe/maybe not.

Someday...cant wait..I will have a pond and on or around it have ducks, swans, cranes, geese, guinea fowls and maybe a peacock around them and short pretty trees. Not too many, just a few.

I got my chicken house finally! I havent gone home to pick the two chicken yet..will do so after exams. I also decided to keep a guinea fowl too. I'll keep them for fun, fun to know I own them.

I am a wierd/odd girl compared to others... have always liked cats and kittens they are calm, I can stand dogs but I find them needy and too affectionate while the cat will just glance when you walk in and mind their business, they only bother you if hungry or sit on/next to you and lick themselves.

I dont like to keep many animals of a kind, a cat with its kittens are pretty but as soon as they grow bigger, they become too much. I dont like animals kept ideally for production like cows and pigs, they are so big and not fun and require so much attention. I would like keep a horse, sheep and goats wandering around maybe 2 of each kind and sell off extras.

I like agriculture for its natural look but not keen to be a farmer. I like trees a few not too many either so will plant some tall ones (maybe jacaranda trees) and some short ones. I will plant grass that I can roll on. I like the easy environment and hope to have it some day.

Checklist...

In December two of my friends had a wedding, my role was kym-kazi ya mkono (Swahili) directly translated hand work -like a handy man- means running around to ensure everything is working well and all corners are covered. At one of the weddings I was given a pair of sun glasses to hold for the bride as she would need them during the ceremony alongside other items, a camera etc. Since my role was running around, I placed the sunglasses on a chair where the sister of the bride picked them and sat on the chair, she also got up at some point.....in the evening, the sun glasses got misplaced. We couldn't tell who had them last and this got the bride very upset.
The bride posted an update on social media that she thought she knew who her friends were but evidently she did not because she lost something of great sentimental value with them around...that sucked as I had the responsibility to take care of them.
She kept checking whether we had found them and eventually we resigned to the fact they were lost, but she did not forget :). So many days after the wedding she asked if we had ever found them I said not and she was really sad so I decided to take responsibility and pay for them. She was very excited at the thought and we even worked out a repayment plan, they were quite out of my league :). I fully repaid for them in a couple of months... but I wasn't too happy that she accepted the repayment...why, you would ask, yet I volunteered to do it anyway... can't explain why clearly...but our friendship's now a marshmallow.

I have been chatting up with a nice guy whom I met at one of my friends wedding, we are all at the marrying age so talks on what kind of partners we would like, come up. After many chats I narrowed down what I thought was his kind of girl, I wasn't it :) but I happened to know a girl who matched up to his description though she was seriously dating someone else.. bottomline, I could tell his kind. So he decided he would try find me a hook up and I asked him if he could describe my kind but he said I was dicreet so he couln't tell. It wasn't that really, he couldn't tell my kind because I didnt have a checklist. On the other hand he has a checklist which he refers to sometimes and that's how I could tell his kind/type.

It could be good to have a checklist but for me I only have a general idea of what I like and it sort of happens naturally and thus not need to ask... are you intelligent? are you hardworking? I find out as we get along and have realised some of the things I would want on my checklist (if I had one) are not as important as others I find in the person and others very impotant.
I think I should come up with a checklist but it would have minimum acceptable percentages..who even does that?! ...for instance he could be 90% intelligent but only 40% hardworking so nooowww...
Many times I have suffered buyers remorse, in boarding school I always looked forward to holidays and when they came I missed hanging out with my school friends and shortly I was looking forward to be back in school. What if somethings on my checklist dont turn to be as cool as I had hoped?


Marshmallows are cute and pretty and look tasty...but I think they taste flat and bland and the spongy feel isn't cool.
On the other hand cheese doesnt taste so good first time you have it, but you acquire the taste as you move along and you cant help but have a cheese burger, pizza , cheese potatoes etc

To have a checklist or not...hmmmm

upset...

Woke up today to news that one of our cabinet ministers, Minister for Environment & Mining Hon. John Michuki has passed on. He was one of the effective leaders we have known as a country especially in his previous docket as Minister for Tranport & Communication. Rest in Peace.
I sure hope he mentored many directly and transferred the good leadership qualities and lessons he had acquired.

Yesterday, a good galfriend was so upset with us (some other galfriends and I) because on Sunday we ended up having a picnic without her. She felt that we did not make any effort to contact her to join us. It happened by chance, we drove from church together (she attends a different service from us) and we got to a fast food restaurant but we decided to take the food away rather than sit. We found a nice picnic spot and had so much fun catching up.
Had better plan for a decent picnic soon for all of us.

Launching the #BEAGENDA2013 today for Palmhouse Foundation...that had better not be upsetting!

my 2 cents worth

Today am not feeling brilliant...my 2 cents worth is really not worth much but for what its worth, here's a little of what I'v been going through in no particular sequence.

I worked on a document earlier this week and submitted it as done, unfortunately I did not save the updated changes. My boss did not open it and forwaded as it was. The recepient had quite a bit of questions and that was not impressive of me.

I have been going to class for over a month now, starting to get the hang of things and learning lots of new things. I thought I knew what Finance was all about until I came across the content am reading now and it is so interesting unlike what I thought.

I decided to run a campaign in support of the Palmhouse Foundation endowment fund, I have worked partialy at it and forwarded to someone who could help with refining it, he's taken so long and am afraid I have created a curiosity in my audience (been talking a little about it) and haven't delivered it yet.
Late last year, I had another idea in its support too, its such a big magazine idea (in my humble view) and will take time developing it little by little.

We have someone in the company who came in recently to handle data analysis, but her expertise is in commercial development so does not have the skills to play around with the data to generate meaningful information. She ran it by me and asked me if I could assist, am not too good at it but I have a few ideas but not refined yet. I have worked a little on it and presented it and she did not look impressed though she liked a few variables...thats did not satisfy me so am currently (ok, on a different window) staring at it and hope it could convert itself to something brilliant*sigh

I have tonnes of assignments I need to do and I still havent bought my chicken house.

I think am developing the desire to own a car, fought to get into a public bus today to get to work on time and left a bad taste in my mouth. If I had one, I'd have picked the chicken house already and carried home a reading chair. Our roads are much better than they were a year ago so the wear and tear on the car would not be as significant. Our fares have gone up so high and almost equivalent to fueling a car. My new busy life has attracted the need for one.

I still want to own a house soon.

I had better start working and reading harder and being smarter. I need more than 2 cents worth!!!

Busy...the good type

I go to work Monday To Friday, I go to school Monday to Saturday, I volunteer in some organisations in between, I go to church on Sunday, I go home every once in a while, I meet up with friends once in a while, I clean up my house once in a while, I cook once in a while and am yet to find time to collect my chicken house.

Interestingly enough, am enjoying all these action.

I had been at a comfort zone for quite a while and did not like it at the end, so here I am taking as much as I can but maintaining a balance.

Maybe I shd think of dating too... hope to find 'chemical x'...ooh boy :)

An in between found sometime to post on the lazy blog.

I need to write down a plan...I have it in my mind but as I get busy, I'm not paying attention to it. Sad could it be if I ended up achieving nothing on my plan. I will review it every week..maybe on Saturday /Sunday... I'll plan that too :)

Its a New Year!

Happy New Year!

I enjoy reading what I have posted in the past, its quite interesting how my mind (anymind) works and how it changes.

I'm in a new job as an accountant, came across it quite interestingly..a story for another day. Its challenging, the environment is so different from what I have ever been exposed to, its very forward looking. I hope to deliver excellently.

I'm a new student, studying an msc in financial economics, havent started classes yet but I will work hard to perform excellently as I do not like my undergraduate grades one bit apart from one unit from very many.

Not so new, almost becoming irritating...I need to complete some 2 accounting professional papers I started a while back, hope to complete them in June this year.

I have been thinking through the definition of an asset, I am able to recognize huge, big assets that I do not have and intangible assets that I have.
Currently I am looking for small assets that I can consider as assets. A small piece of land is a true asset but when am not using it I do not consider it as one.
Cash in the bank is more of a liability than asset to me especially when I havent budgeted for it.
My mind is working hard to get a decent, interesting and challenging form of investment...maybe start on building a house..

I am looking to keep 3 chicken outside my house... sounds ridiculously fun.

I have volunteered to help a certain lady who runs a foundation to keep her accounts and I am still a trustee of Palmhouse Foundation.

I have quite a bit on schedule, I hope to be excellent at the things I do.

whoever did these...

I think they are creative!

my friend map from facebook

 I know 97% of my facebook friends and have met them in person....oops the map's dull!

a house...

Yesterday I called the landlady and asked if she has ever thought of selling the flat/apartment I currently rent. It is a small house with decent finishing that I really like, it is one of 13 apartments in the building. I have lived in several other houses but this is the only one the thought of buying has crossed my mind.

I have wanted to construct a small house for the longest time ever. I have never liked paying rent.
I googled a small house plan and still thinking about it though could modify it as we move along. I would not want to construct a dream house yet, my thoughts and dreams are fashioning out currently (I did not grow up with a definite dream, in kindergarten/nursery I wouldn't say what I wished to be when I grew up as other children did)

I would wish to own several apartments and a vacation home and a dream home some day. 

The land lady had thought of selling the units but is not sure how to go about it. She asked me to research about it and get back to her. I currently do not have the money to buy the house but I don't mind following up on a mini dream... who knows I could land a couple of millions sometime and I wont have to sit and think hard of what to do with it!

Smiling as I write this at how ridiculous it sounds at my current state, I cant wait for things to start looking up!

Things have been on a roller coaster!

I am a bit frazzled but very hopeful of a positive income and outcome.

I have become more aware of myself, I can almost explain what my dreams are and not think 'I am just saying for saying'.

I asked a friend why we bother go to work, to keep busy and to get ahead of our peers she answered, really, seriously, surely? I had better come up with a better explanation soon...but it has something to do with making a difference to my community,society and world at large.

I think I know why I like Mr.Donald Trump, he is powerful that is one of my attraction criteria and especially because it is not a position power its more of 'The Leader Who had no Title' by Robin Sharma Kind.
He hasn't been asked by anyone to deliver on certain parameters, he just delivers. If it was for his children, he would have stopped a while back when he made enough to support them. If it is greed, he wouldn't be working as hard, he would have found ways to cut corners and make easy quick money. He has a drive one not too many have.

I am out of a job as of the end of this month, reasons are related to above write up. I need to figure where I am going, to do what and start moving in that direction.

I need to do a lot of practice on the things I enjoy doing, It is said to become an expert at something I need to invest 10,000 hours at it.

I have been accessing a lot of random information from books, reality shows, practical experience and they are forming a critical path, I should be very scared now that am out of a job but I am not sure I am, I am looking for the best route to get me to where I intend to go.

color code test...

Your Analysis (Vertical line = Average)


YELLOW MOTIVE: FUN

YELLOW NEEDS: To look good (socially), To be noticed, To be praised, Approval from the masses.

YELLOW WANTS: To hide insecurities (loosely), Happiness, Freedom, Playful adventure.

SUMMARY: Yellows value play. They consider life to be a party, and they're hosting. Yellows welcome praise. They need to be noticed. Little else improves a relationship with a Yellow more than praise. They need emotional connections. They often appear so nonchalant that people think they don't care about anything. Nothing can be further from the truth. They need a great deal of attention. They need to be stroked. They enjoy touching. To them, physical contact is often the most direct, comfortable intimate connection. Yellows want to be popular. They like to be center stage. Friendships command a high priority in their lives because popularity answers one of their basic needs - the need for general approval. Yellows like action. They are easily bored, and seek adventure. They can never sit still for long, so they choose friends who, like them, refuse to allow the "boring details" get in the way of the most important thing in life - play.


WHITE MOTIVE: PEACE

WHITE NEEDS: To feel good (inside), To be allowed their own space, To be respected, Tolerance.

WHITE WANTS: To withhold insecurities, Kindness, Independence, Contentment.

SUMMARY: Whites are motivated by peace. They will do almost anything to avoid confrontation. They like to flow through life without hassle or discomfort. Feeling good is even more important to them then being good. Whites need kindness. They resent being scolded. They dislike harsh words. They open up instantly to people who are kind, but Whites recoil from those who are hostile. Whites prefer quiet strength. they enjoy their quiet independence. This can often be perceived as bullheadedness. Whites like to keep a low profile. They like to be asked their opinions but they won't volunteer them. Whites are independent. Unlike Reds and Blues who want to control others, Whites seek only to avoid being controlled. They don't like to be pushed, and they can be fearsome when they finally "blow up." Whites are motivated by other peoples desires. They want suggestions however, not demands.


BLUE MOTIVE: Intimacy

BLUE NEEDS: To be good (morally), To be understood, To be appreciated, Acceptance.

BLUE WANTS: To reveal insecurities, Quality, Autonomy, Security.

SUMMARY: Blues are motivated by altruism. They love to do nice things for others. they look for opportunities to give up something in order to bring another person happiness. selflessness rather than selfishness is their guiding philosophy. Blues seek intimacy. They want to be loved and to love. A true blue will sacrifice a successful career to improve an important relationship. Blues crave being understood. They are gratified when they are listened to, when they feel understood and appreciated. Blues may have their hearts broken more than most people, but they also spend much more time in love. Blues are directed by a strong moral conscience. They have a moral code that guides them in their decision making, their value judgements, and their leisure time. A blue would rather lose than cheat. Ethically, blues are people who should be in positions of power, but seldom are.


RED MOTIVE: Power

RED NEEDS: To look good (Technically), To be right, To be respected, Approval from a select few.

RED WANTS: To hide insecurities (tightly), Productivity, Leadership, Challenging adventure

SUMMARY: Reds are hungry for power. simply stated reds want their own way. They can be manipulative. Reds find it almost impossible to relinquish their power and freedom when they meet with authority figures. Reds want to be productive. Reds like to work - in school, in their their careers, and in their relationships. They are often work-a-holics. They will, however, resist being forced to do anything that doesn't interest them. Reds want to look good to others. Reds need to appear knowledgeable. They want to be respected even more than they want to be loved. They want to be admired for their practical and logical minds. Reds shouldn't be taken too seriously. They often state the facts as they see them. They seldom say "in my opinion" before stating their opinions. Reds seek leadership opportunities. Reds are often called "control freaks." If a red can get an upper hand, she or he will.

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/the-color-code-test

disadvantaged?

I like oxymoron! a figure of speech that combines contradictory terms.

I came across one today on Pstr.M's blog trip to Singapore (edited)


'durain or the ‘king of fruits’. It has a tough green exterior with sharp thorns and cutting into it needs serious skills. It has a strong ammonia smell that sticks to your hands and mouth. The smell is so strong that it’s illegal to carry one onto public transportation! In light of which it’s sweet and creamy taste and texture come as quite a surprise. Eating it has been likened to eating strawberries and cream in a toilet!'


When I get to travel, many times I look out for,'what do they have that I/we don't,never have, never seen'. Coming from Africa where we are 'disadvantaged', am always looking out for the differences we have compared to others. Recently saw somewhere that in Africa from the day we are born we are disadvantaged, by just being born here! especially in comparison to children in developed countries.

Being a woman, the referred 'weaker sex', there goes another 'disadvantage'.

Now try, a Woman born in Africa!

I do not mind unglamorous reports about people, things, places etc, I find them intriguing. I try to find the possible or even just an ounce of good in them, and am always pleasantly surprised.
Same applies to glamorous reports of people, things or places that don't live up to their fame leading to buyer remorse and major disappointment.

I do not mind being thought little of,but I mind it a lot when I live up to the little thoughts.

3 things recently...

The Activist vs The Agent


I looked up the meaning of Activist and the meaning of Agent
Activist: an especially active vigorous advocate of a cause
vs
Agent: a person or thing that acts or has the power to act
Both kinds of individuals are great, they bring about change, more often desirable change, but I definitely prefer one.


The promised land

When the 12 spies were sent out to explore The Promised Land, it was not empty waiting for them to come and occupy it but for sure It was flowing with milk and honey.
This was what they found in Canaan...
"They came back to Moses and Aaron and the whole Israelite community at Kadesh in the Desert of Paran. There they reported to them and to the whole assembly and showed them the fruit of the land.
They gave Moses this account: "We went into the land to which you sent us, and it does flow with milk and honey! Here is its fruit. But the people who live there are powerful, and the cities are fortified and very large. We even saw descendants of Anak there.
The Amalekites live in the Negev; the Hittites, Jebusites and Amorites live in the hill country; and the Canaanites live near the sea and along the Jordan." ...and it did take quite a while to conquer it, but it was still The Promised Land.


The Monkey Problem

I came across a site by ManagerZine article The Second Skill: Getting Rid Of Monkeys
This is a what took it home. "We received a call from a far-flung reader with a monkey problem. He had three direct reports who were managers themselves. Each had some heavy new responsibilities. Turns out, they were not shy about getting him involved with their work.“Can you please review this before I send it out?” was a typical request.“I’ve got a problem. Here’s what happens” was another. Pretty soon, his work became their work and his time was not his own.
What is happening here is a classic back and forth game of who has responsibility. The subordinate puts the monkey on the manager when she asks for a review or when the boss is asked to solve a problem. When a manager picks up the monkey from a direct report, he or she is literally working for the subordinate. The manager’s time is being taken up by a subordinate’s work. Something is wrong with this picture."... very entertaining and infuriating.

my opinion

Developed Country vs Developing Country

Life in a developing country is far more expensive than in a developed country.

In Celebrity Apprentice, the winning team receives an award of $20,000 towards their choice charity, and it has been surprising to see the celebrities appreciate that as an award,not that it is not 'something', its just that had it been on this end, the equivalent would be around Ksh.1.6Million which for a foundation I work with currently would go towards supporting 8 children through their four years secondary education www.palmhsefoundation.org against a target of 70 children. This means that such an award would be not as competitive to a celebrity here as it is in the developed country and clearly the cost of basic education is quite expensive here.

I traveled to LA, California for RYLA-Rotary Youth Leadership Awards a while back a two weeks trip. I carried with me Ksh.50,000 ($640) and I made it back with Ksh.30,000 ($385). I would pay for my meals, take a bus or a cab and managed to bring back souvenirs for my family. That was far lower than I expected to spend and I was not a miser.
I bet that it was an issue of standard of living, I went for basic commodities that are quite expensive on this end as compared to the same in developed countries. I did not think of quality, rather availability.

The cost of communication is quite high in developing countries and the gadgets are only available to the elite few, transport costs are forbidding and we have many who walk to and fro work for long distances. In my country, we have been trying to develop a 24hr economy but offices and shops are located within the city centre while the population live in outskirts and with inadequate and expensive lighting structure, the city centre is deserted at night.

The low income earners spend more than middle and high income earners. They buy basic commodities in pieces which costs much more in the long run than bulk purchasing made by middle and high income earners. Our main evaluation of products is availability and not quality.

Local telecommunication campaigns only widen the gap between the rich and poor as costs are very expensive for low denomination value of airtime and internet which the poor are only able to afford, if and when the access it. The larger the denomination value, the cheaper it becomes and this locks out the poor.

The poor buy paraffin for cooking and lighting as a cheaper oil product as compared to buying LPG which comes packaged in bulk and thus cheaper in the long run, benefits the middle and high income earners.

Large multinationals are closing shop on this end as the costs of productions are steep and we have become net importers as our export is mainly agricultural products affected by changes in weather.

Of course corruption and poor systems increases our costs due to inadequacies which some take advantage of and exploit them. Black markets and hoarding also increase our costs to unbearable heights.

We also have many tax defaulters who do not contribute to development kitty, a scarcity mentality indeed as they would also have lower costs if accountability by all was observed.

The most unfortunate thing is that we have poverty of the mind. Compounds directly in-front of our houses are extremely dirty, we have litter everywhere, sewerage spew on the road and no one claims responsibility of these 'small things',we demand for responsibility from our leaders for 'large things' but we do not expect much as they come from us.

These among more could be reasons why costs in developing countries are higher than in developed countries.

different...

I have such an interesting and unique personality... just like everyone else.

I do not have time to rest, relax and enjoy myself.
I do not know how to let loose.
I do not have a standard fun thing.
I do not have a social life 'so to speak'.
I do not understand what motivation means.
I do not have a random sense of adventure.
I do not like living within people's expectations.

Instead

I join groups with an interesting agenda and enjoy myself at it.

I attend numerous meetings that I learn from. Not wedding committees and such that have a similar agenda with different cast.

I hang out with people whom we have a common goal of sorts, when it differs greatly our paths rarely cross.

I will enjoy the company of just anyone who is trying to get somewhere, the energy is just amazing and will not be too comfortable when they start settling, getting comfortable, and relaxed.

I like freedom a lot, I want to go where I want, do what I want and not do some things by just choice. As much as possible, I try to be where I want/feel like and where I am comfortable. Some take this as being difficult and stubbornness, its not.

I like time outs to think through things, I create them; take a book and find a park to sit and read,within a few moments I get to thinking world.

I enjoy doing just anything with lovely and brilliant company; sit and talk, go for a walk, do household chores, hiking, camping the list is endless. These are not my favorite things, I wouldn't be keen to do any of them with wrong company.

I always look for the purpose in things..even lame reasons (not excuses), as long as there is a reason, am good to go. Several examples follow;

A conversation I recently had with a friend;
Me:Lets go for the meeting
Friend: No, am working late, there's traffic, I hadn't planned to etc you just go.
Me: Nooo lets just go
Friend: you see you had the heart for it, I dont.
Me: Ok, that's a better answer now I understand.

Another I just remembered,a good friend dropped out of school and did not tell me and I found out later and was not very amused for being the last to know.
Me: Why didn't you tell me?
Him: (cant remember answers he gave)... I did not want to talk about it
Me: Why not,yet everyone else knew about it.
Him: Fine cause you really want me to tell you, I will but I will not feel good about myself. (he starts..)
Me : (interrupts)no don't tell me, it's ok, now you don't need to anymore.

This other resulted in a fight, my friend and I decided just to drop it and not because we understood each other.
Friend: I want to join the army
Me: Why, what for?
Friend: (cant remember specifics)..they have good training etc
a lot of back and forth
Me: Why the army?
Friend: Lets just drop it.

A couple of years later,
Friend: You know you think you know me too well but you don't.
Me: Why do you say that?
Friend: Remember when I wanted to join the army, you made it seem as if I couldn't do it, as if you knew what was best for me...but nope you were not right.
Me: What did I say wrong?
Friend: You questioned it a lot as if I did not know what I was doing.
Me: I am very sorry, but that was not the intention. I was looking for a reason.

I am different.

I have such an interesting and unique personality... just like everyone else.

leaders listen...

Just stumbled across something I wrote a while back. I had attended a Rotaract training and we were asked to make a commitment that we would hope to achieve and make a habit from. I picked, 'I'd read a book every month'. The moderator said the only way they'd confirm that I had read, is if I wrote a short summary of the book I read.

The end of the month came and it was just the wrong month because I had not read a new book. Fortunately, I had been attending a few church classes where we were trying to read through The Bible in one year, that evening I read Exodus chapter 18 and this is the summary I shared...


I decided to have a look at an inspirational book…The Bible…Apart from the religious aspect of it, it really is an inspirational book.

In Exodus Chapter 18- Jethro visits Moses.

In my understanding...

Jethro was Moses’s father in law and he came to visit Moses one day. Moses had sent home his wife and two sons after he saw what a great responsibility he had to handle the Israelites. I don’t know if that was a good decision but maybe it was inevitable for him then.

The next day Moses took his seat to serve as judge for the people and they stood around him from morning till evening. When his father in law saw all that Moses was doing for the people he asked, “what is this you are doing for the people? Why do you sit alone and judge, while all these people stand around from morning till evening?”

Moses answered him, “Because all these people come to seek God’s will.Whenever they have a dispute, it is brought to me and I decide the parties and inform them of God’s decrees and laws".

This guy had so much responsibility and I would imagine that he had to deal with petty crimes to hard rock kind of cases; sibling rivalry, murder, guys stealing chicken, other stealing lots and lots of gold and silver…there was no cash those days.

Moses’ father in law replied, “What you are doing is not good. You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you, you cannot handle it alone. Listen now to me and I will give you some advice and may God be with you. You must be the people’s representative before God and bring their disputes to him. Teach them the decrees and laws and show them the way to live and the duties they are to perform. But select capable men from all the people who fear God, trustworthy men who hate dishonest gain and appoint them as officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens (delegation). Have them serve as judges for the people at all times but have them bring every difficult case to you, the simple cases, they can decide for themselves. That will make your load lighter…

Now those days Moses used to be the overall say but he chose to listen to his father in law and did as he suggested and he had less strain and leadership roles developed just from delegation…results.

Responsibility – Listening – Action - Results.

Read it again today, I still think it is a lesson you cannot afford to live without.

Leaders Listen!

not shy... anything to avert too much attention

Some people are not shy, though they may appear to be, they just do anything to avert too much attention. They will not say too much unless its necessary or they are cornered, They will not dress strikingly or so absurd which will attract attention, They do not like to go to places where they will meet everyone they know, They will not volunteer for roles with maximum lime light, they are just average in appearance, not much to write home about.

They may appear to be in conflict with Marianne Williamson...
“Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.”

Instead...

They wear clothes a size bigger than they are, they say little or nothing to celebrities and will avoid them as much as possible, they are often embarrassed when given too much praise, they volunteer for seemingly small inconspicuous roles, They rarely share what is in their dreams as they have some fear of disappointment which is worse if 'everyone knew about it'.

Something else they do...

They study people around them, They silently listen to conversations around them,They have different types of conflicting friends as they do not engage in similar activities as their friends do but will sit around to listen in anyway... this often brings conflict with the quote "show me your friends and I'll show you who you are".

The confusing part...

If you are a friend, you probably think they are the most talkative people in the world! They say things in abstract form and most often appear complicated, while this is the safest way for them to express themselves. You probably know they can speak well or lead well but when asked to do it, they'll more often than not refuse and only step up if there is no other capable or willing person. With a comfortable public, they will come forth as 'know it all' as they know a bit of everything from all the people they are often around.

They are extroverted introverts ha!